I've Got to Have a Better Reason than FEAR.....

So it came to me. I don't know if it was the 2 days of lying motionless riddled with exhaustion, barely able to move, and nonexistent appetite. It was a very unfamiliar feeling for me and from what I was hearing there was a weird virus going around. Somehow I got it. But in the midst of my physical handicap it came to me. It really came to me! As I sat in my sewing room with my head laid on my sewing desk, unable to do anything my daughter was sweet enough to bring me a pillow. I looked around and my eyes locked on my dressform with a draped top on it I was waiting to convert into a pattern and ultimately make into a cute top for me to wear.

(Using old plaid knit fabric I draped this top. It's a halter style fitted bodice top with underbust gathers and has a flared midriff which I intend to further flare)

 So I want to focus on that draping project for a second. It seems like it's been a symbol of sorts. I danced around the idea of finishing it, critiquing it, and claiming it wasn't finished but in reality it was. My reluctance clearly spelled out my problem but I already knew my problem and have been working/struggling to dispel it. It's been FEAR. That's right, I said and I admitted it. And it's not been the first time I've been frozen by it. Well in my case I haven't been entirely frozen but let's just say I have been moving very slowly because of it. Doubting my skills, stretching out the completion of projects, being entirely too hard on myself when I was indeed doing very good work. These were all the sabotaging works of fear. But over the last few weeks thanks to some great advice, insight, wonderful mentors and divine intervention I've been digging myself out of that hole. And being in a physically incapacitated state only confirmed that FEAR is a lousy excuse for not rising to a challenge or fulfilling your dreams. In the midst of being sick I so wanted to really get up and sew but didn't have the strength to. It's funny how for once my body actually mimicked what my mind oftentimes did to me. It was my fearful thoughts that have been keeping me incapacitated for so long. It's really crazy how you can build your own mental prison. Again, it's amazing how much clarity you have when you're at a low point. It's probably one of the best results.  It's because of this moment that I NOW stake my claim that  if I'm not going to reach my goals "I've got to have a better reason than fear". Fear seems so trivial and powerless at this point. It's lost it's intimidation factor.  Temporary sickness stopped me in my tracks and thankfully gave me much insight!

 I'm all better now (thank GOD--I'm well 99.9% of the time and can't take being sick)---- but I have a new mindset!  I've turned over a new leaf and am thankful for it.I'm READY to complete my draped top and will! Realistically, I realize that fear NEVER goes away entirely. If fear has been a nuisance to you and the pursuit of your dreams, goals and passions I hope you have the courage to "kick it to the curb" too! May the COURAGE you exude overshadow all your fears! I wish you the very best. And now I'll leave you with one of my favorite quotes---it's a little crude but WONDERFULLY TRUE!!!